I had an appointment with my oncologist on Friday, unfortunately my tumor markers show that the chemo is not having the desired effect on my cancer. Really I wasnt surprised, I felt that I was worse but basically it was a guess. I am in more pain despite the increase in my pain meds, the lymphoedema is much worse and extremely painful at times, the frozen shoulder also manages to give me masses of interesting pains.

Peter was with me when the oncologist gave me the bad news, he actually took it pretty well, he is managing to keep fairly optomistic at this stage. I have been very depressed but with a change of meds and miraculous support from Pete, Mallory and Sam I am mostly staying fairly positive.

Mallory's pregnancy is progressing better, as she approaches her second trimester her morning sickness seems to be subsiding, although still giving her some grief, while purchasing baby goods seems to be filling in my time.

We did manage to pick up a wheelchair for me today, this now means I wontbe restricted to the house, I also got my disabled car parking permit on Friday, that will save Pete and Mal a lot of effort when they take me out.

I guess I am coming to terms with my "future" basically by working on the present, there are times when i become very depressed mainly when I suffer from lack of sleep, a frequent occurance.